Letters to an Asexual #62 (Troll Variety Pack)

Letters to an Asexual #62 (Troll Variety Pack)

Hey folks, it’s swankivy, and it’s time for
another Letters to an Asexual, this is number 62. I realized that I hadn’t got around to making
a video for this month, and I try to post a new one every month, so my apologies, I
almost missed the month of September, but here I am. And uh, I decided that this time instead of
offering a single letter where there’s a bunch of back and forth between me and the other
person, I’m gonna share with you a series of shorter messages, slightly more trollish. It’ll be fun. Um, in a couple of cases, I didn’t respond,
because it was not, uh, necessary. Um, and in a couple of cases I just uh, dismissed
what they had to say very quickly. So I have not one, not two, not five, but
SIX of these very brief messages, kind of to give some of y’all an idea of the um, sorta
drive-by comment that we get. Um, you know, not everybody who wants to talk
about this subject is willing to go into um, a nuanced conversation about it, of course. Most of them just wanna make their snotty
comment and drive away. So, here’s what some of those sound like. Uh, I will open my message here. And, um, we’ll get into the first one. All right. This was left as a comment on I believe, yeah,
on my Shit People Say to Asexuals video, which as you may remember if you’ve seen it, is
a collaboration between me and 15 other asexual-spectrum folks. So, um, this is directed at us. “You guys are all such fucking losers, whatever
label you wanna give yourselves. You’re all the same, just with slight twists
on what kind of loser you identify as: LGTBIPAZ-aserisk-amber–ampersand-carat-percent sign-ampersand-carat-dot-dot-dot.” And uh, I responded to that and said, “LOL
so in other words . . . ‘GRARRR sexuality is complicated and I don’t like that there
are words that reflect that so I need to take time out of my day to tell them where I DRAW
THE LINE! I don’t understand the point of people needing
to talk about their sexualities or have words for who they are so it’s REALLY IMPORTANT
to get on YouTube and tell them how ridiculous and unreasonable I think they are because
OMG this LGBT acronym is getting TOO LONG TOO MANY LETTERS UGH people whose experiences
aren’t relevant to me don’t need a word nooooooooooooooooooo.’ I think I got that translation pretty good
but let me know if I left anything out.” And he actually replied to that and said,
“It’s pretty simple. You have normal relations as nature intended,
or you have degenerate ones. (or in your case, no relations because you’ve
got some mental issues).” And I said, “Yeah, it is pretty simple. You appoint yourself the spokesperson for
what nature intends, assign people who don’t agree with you ‘mental issues,’ deliberately
seek out the educational materials of people you don’t agree with so you can call them
‘fucking losers’ and shame them, and then claim it’s US who’s looking for attention. ^___^ You’re such a shitlord. Go crawl back in your troll cave.” I think I blocked him at that point or maybe
he just gave up. Here’s the next one. And it just says, “Asexual equals fat virgin.” So I said, “Trollish YouTuber=so laughably
insecure. It’s okay, honey. I understand. Projecting like this protects your squishy
insides.” And this person responds with, “At least I
have a husband and a family.” And I said, “You know, if you want to harass
people and make them feel bad, it doesn’t work very well to snot at them about having
THINGS THEY EXPLICITLY SAY THEY DON’T WANT. You might want to ask yourself why you so
desperately need to kick people that you perceive as unfortunate (though we don’t consider ourselves
pitiable). Like, really? Do you go up to people whose clothes are threadbare
and say LOL YOU’RE POOR? Do you go up to people with disabilities and
shout slurs at them and mock their mobility aids? Does that make your precious heart feel superior? Seriously, ask yourself that.” They didn’t respond to that. And then I got a comment that I didn’t bother
to reply to, and they had a racial slur in their username. I may have reported them for that, I don’t
remember. So they wrote, “wow, hundreds of fucking videos
about your asexuality. Is that your whole life? Your whole life revolves about your untouched
vag and how much of a prize it is. No one is seriously messaging you wanting
to date. Maybe unless they are that desperate. Half of these so called ‘letters’ have to
be your own delusions. No ones cares about you or your dried up snatch. You look like a Woodstock reject. You’re not a real author or a spokesperson,
just someone with no life that found a stupid title to latch onto. Get over yourself and get a real hobby.” They’re so furious that we talk about ourselves
in places that have nothing to do with them. And here’s another one. “Really, the world doesn’t give a fuck if
you like cock, pussy, ass, mouth, ponies, vagoos, traps boipussies or none of them. It’s not a big deal. It’s not a thing. It’s your buttfrustrated mind that pretends
all the above quotes have any negative meaning to you.” And I said, “Aw honey. If it’s not that big a deal, then just don’t
watch our silly little selves who are obviously bleating about something completely insignificant! Give your precious attention to what Really
Matters. We’ll all be very impressed.” Here’s the next one. “Can’t believe people care this much about
a damn label. In the real world no one cares who you are. I bet you five dollars that you’re going to
be blaming the patriarchy on the fact that you didn’t get your job because ‘asexual,’
‘genderfluid,’ and ‘otherkin’ weren’t available sex options on the résumé. Grow up.” And I actually replied to that one, and I
said, “Us: ‘We’re not sexually attracted to anyone, and these are things people say to
demonstration of projection and unfortunate insecurity.” And they replied to me and said, “Thanks Tumblr. If I ask for anything is that you stay out
of the real world and continue circlejerking your self-diagnosed mental disorders on the
internet.” Wait, I thought I was being shamed for not
being able to function in the real world, and now you’re telling me I shouldn’t–I don’t
know. Anyway. Ahhhh. And here’s the last one. “I think there’s a few reasons why these people
aren’t having sex.” Ooooh, burn. And I said, “You’re adorable. Actually quite a few of the people in the
video are asexual people partnered with non-asexual people and have sex with their partners. ‘Asexual’ means ‘not sexually attracted to
anyone.’ But your hilariously uninformed knee-jerk
compulsion to imply that we’re not getting laid because LOL ugly is noted. If that’s what you have to tell yourself so
you don’t have to think about asexuality being a real thing that describes people you know
and encounter in life, do whatever you have to do so you can sleep at night.” And they replied to me, and said, “It appears
I have struck a nerve. ” Sure ya did bud. Again, tell yourself that if you need to sleep
at night. Um, on that last one, it’s really, uh, curious
to me that so many people will feel like they accomplished something or ooh, I triggered
you! Ohhh, triggered! Like, what are you talking about? I responded to you. Am I winning because I made a video that made
you talk to me? I mean, at what point is any kind of response
at all evidence that you upset someone, or you uh, influenced someone to think something? I just, I’m really confused about what they
think the game is if they always seem to think they won it. Heh heh. Yeah, basically, anytime I respond to someone
and they’re just like “ooh, I touched a nerve, ooh I really got under your skin, looks like,
looks like I upset you, looks like I triggered you!” it’s like, hmm, why are you, why would
you be proud of that if that was true? But I mean, did you not want me to respond
to you, or, I don’t know. Maybe part of it also is that some of my responses
are longer than theirs. And so they’re assuming I’m over here in a
frothing rage, and I’m like, mmm, really no, I mean, I’m able to use your ignorance as
a teaching tool for other people, and um, you know, thanks for providing the example
of the kind of things that ignorant people say in this world to people like us. Of course, there are also a bunch of people
who say, like, I demonstrated that no one cares about this, but clearly, people care
enough that they’re always ranting about it, they’re seeking us out to tell us that we
need to be shamed, we need to get our mental insh–issues checked out, we need to shut
up, or we need to assimilate into society, or we need to accept that we’re degenerates,
um, it’s stuff like this that uh, really makes me wonder why it is that uh, anybody thinks
nobody has a problem with asexual people, I mean, it’s just hundreds, and thousands,
of comments in my, in my YouTube videos, in my OKCupid, anywhere that I talk about being
asexual, I’m always getting harassment like this from, you know, people who want me to
feel bad about it. And uh, I mean, that’s, that’s telling, isn’t
it. Um, so if anyone watching this is, has ever
been of the opinion that people don’t really care about asexuality, uh, when it comes to
living and let live, uh, it’s very clear people have a really hard time with it, and that
they, they really wanna harass us over it, they consider us one of a group of people
that you know, needs to be shamed for our sexuality, and um, you know, you also see
some victim blaming there, like “well MAYBE if YOU weren’t all over the Internet talking
about it,” it’s like, I should be able to talk about my experience without getting attacked. It’s not my fault that I’m getting attacked
because I, I talked so much, I made a video every month, oh my goodness. Um, but. Anyway, uh, that’s the end of my drive-by
comments, uh, I should also say that for the first time in a couple of years I guess, I’m
gonna be doing a talk at a college, next month, so um, hopefully if I’m able to get a recording
of uh, the discussion and the talk that I give, um, when I go to Massachusetts next
month, um, I’ll be able to share on the channel, um, and I’m gonna be talking for LGBT History
Month, uh, as part of our program, I’m gonna discuss, uh, asexuality in the context of
the larger community and its past, present, and future. So hopefully, that’ll be, you know, a really
valuable discussion, and I’ll be able to show you a much more prepared talk than just me
reading my hate mail like I usually do, so I’ll see y’all next time. Thanks for watching.

16 thoughts on “Letters to an Asexual #62 (Troll Variety Pack)

  1. Do I continue writing my classes assigned legal memo on non-competition clauses…..or do I watch a swankivy video…..well the choice is obvious.

  2. Imagine walking into a science class with this mindset.
    Chemistry: "No one cares about the electrons and protons! THEY ARE ALL ATOMS SWEETY. Stop making special categories to justify having a chemistry job you special snowflake! I work a 9-5 job just like everyone else! No need for these in depth made up labels! No cares about them in the real world!"

  3. Would you feel comfortable sharing what school you are speaking at? I go to school in mass, and if i got the chance, id love to come watch your presentation.

  4. +swankivy I pity the fools who troll this Channel. To me, an asexual nature is one of a thousand-plus possible kinds of neurodivergence. Spectrumites (viz., denizens of the autism spectrum) much like and unlike myself invented the term to describe medically-qualifiable deviations from the neurologic mode of humankind (viz. the neurotypical).

  5. Yeah pretty weird that people don´t care so much about asexualiy that they insult us and say we are wrong or broken.
    I mean that proofs that they don´t care /s.
    I bet you could make an another asexual bingo video with all the shit you are getting.

    Btw. I really like the Steven Universe T-shirt^^
    If you watched the latest episodes what to you think about them ?^^

    I also found two interesting videos about Steven Universe which explain why the show is so good^^.



  6. I dislike you asexual people, I don't know why I just do. I didn't know what it was until a few weeks ago. I think you are stupid, and borderline autistic. I did research on it and found that many say they are on the spectrum. Something is indeed broken inside your mental chemistry or your hormonal output, your attempts to Define it as just the way you are are incorrect scientifically when the innate drive and all living things is to have intercourse and reproduce. You all should be ashamed for these made up labels that you create, a romantic allosexual pansexual excetera, all nonsense. Shame is needed in society because it is a deterrent from doing abnormal Acts. I'm saying all this a lot nicer and what I really think inside because I want to insult you all. Although, I suppose the one positive thing about asexuals is they arent being a ho, if I had a daughter and there was a choice between being asexual or a porn star, I know which one I pick.

  7. I absolutely adore the way these people talk because they actually believe they sound intelligent, the way you handle them is pure gold Ivy.
    The following line actually made me chuckle due to the pathetic attempt at trying to own you.

    "At least I have a husband and a family"

    This is the kind of crap that is often thrown out there. So this makes you better? I desire neither (by family of course it's heavily implied they mean children) and am perfectly content with that, but go on and tell me that my life incomplete and sad without them. That reminds me of this jackass I ran into yesterday, who went "Lol I'm gay so I am better than you" over and over again on a sexuality forum because I told him " A specific kind of sexuality doesn't make you superior." The bastard didn't even think he was trolling, people like this sicken me.

  8. Several years ago, you made a video of singing Wind's Nocturne.. I'm sorry you keep having to fight trolls, and commend your strive…. I wish you didn't have to mess with it. I miss you singing..

  9. the people who hate us will NEVER get it, news flash i'm a muslim female with this issue many of us, can't even get regularly married and in our religion its half of our faith to marry… so stop judging we don't fit into the box. we ARE the 1% also, if asexual means fat virgin that's ok we don't have sex.

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